I'm writing this from the hospital once again. She is currently fighting an infection brought on by her shunt. The doctors had to remove it and now she is on an external drain for 10-14 days and then after the infection clears will have another shunt put into place. We knew with the hydrocephalus diagnosis that there are no easy answers or clear directions as to what is going to happen with our child. It is literally a day by day thing that we take to the Lord and have to trust Him with...I go through my days of strong faith and days where I let fear get in my way and wish I could see how this was all going to turn out. I know we've all done this at times in our lives as we go through the valleys and times of unanswered questions or tragedies. In the end, I believe who God is and what He says or I don't and each day I choose to believe He is good, He is love, He is mercy, and He is creator. He is the Alpha and Omega..the beginning and the end. He knows Zoe's beginning and her end and He has created her with powerful purpose. It is not my job to figure everything out...I daily surrender her to the One who made her and knows her more than I do right now. We will love her no matter what and even though it is stressful and painful at times....I trust Him. We've Come This Far By Faith!!!!
**January 10th began very early for the Archers. I had to be at the hospital by 7 am for a 10 am scheduled c section. We spent the night in Columbus as did Troy's parents. Emma loves motels/hotels. I think she thinks of it as an adventure! She loved having her own pull out bed! We arrived at OSU hospital and began to get settled in to pre op. Emma stayed with Grandma and Papaw in the waiting room. Eventually our Pastor, Michael Bullock arrived as well. He and his wife Kathy and their girls are like family to us and Emma absolutely adores them all. I know he and Kathy kept her entertained as well. My family arrived a little later. Ann and Michelle (my aunt and cousin) are an amazing source of strength and love in my life. We have all been through some extraordinary circumstances together. We've all lost our moms, who were our best friends and supporters and who we miss every day we live here on earth. They have held me up during many tough times, so I was thankful to have them with me on this important day. Michelle's daughter Erica also came up and brought Emma a Belle doll. Erica is expecting a baby this summer, so we are so excited.
Troy and I found out that the C Section was delayed due to some emergency surgeries that happened already that morning. One surgery was to deliver a set of triplets!! Whoa...I've thought about that family often since that day and wondered how they were getting along...I was only having one and that was enough for me! Anyway, I was pretty miserable waiting in that pre op room on that not so comfortable bed. I had many people come back and visit me and pray with me, which was a huge comfort. Today was a day I had been thinking and praying about for many months. I was getting ready to meet Zoe and had so many questions and fears. I also had some fear about surgery as well. I wish I could explain all that was going through my head while waiting. I needed peace so badly and as always, the Lord provided that peace in many different ways.
Finally, the time came to go back for surgery. I had a wonderful surgery assistant who helped get through the spinal anesthesia. They got me all set up and finally Troy could come in...when I saw him I had such comfort and peace. We are such a good team and I knew that I could do this with him at my side. Dr. Thung came in and everything started. During the procedure, Troy and I sang songs...I'm sure the surgery team probably thought we were crazy, but I didn't care. We sang Because of Who You Are by Martha Munizzi and then Our God by Chris Tomlin. I knew this C section was going to be difficult due to the size of Zoe's head and it took a LONG time to get her out. As we were singing "And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us" we heard Dr. Thung say "oh look...she's looking at me" and then we heard her first cry...music to our ears! It was a joyful time, but also a time of uncertainty as they whisked her away to another part of the room. Troy went over to see her and came back and told me she was beautiful and she was ok....her head was very large, but in that moment she was the most beautiful thing we have seen next to our Emma Grace. They let me see her and kiss her and then they needed to take her to the NICU to start all the tests and exams that would happen before she was transported to Children's Hospital. It seemed like eternity before they were finished with me and then wheeled me back to recovery. The nurses at OSU were so awesome.
The time finally came for Zoe to be transported to Children's. They brought her to me to see and kiss one last time. Troy brought Emma back and we had a special moment of love and prayer and then she was gone. It was harder than I even imagined, but I knew she was going to be ok. I finally got to go to a room and rest and Troy went with our Pastor and Kathy to follow Zoe and take care of the admission. God brought us through this first day and we were thankful to finally have met our Zoe Lynn. I hope you enjoy these pictures. Some Troy took and the others were taken by my cousin Michelle. She and her husband are professional photographers. They did our wedding pics and have taken beautiful pics of Emma. Their website is http://www.rodenbergerphotography.com/. I'm so thankful to my inlaws and all who helped us that day!
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